Beyond the Diamond:
Alternative Stones for Engagement Rings
The diamond has dominated engagement ring culture for barely 70 years, a remarkably short tradition. Sapphires, rubies, emeralds and other stones have centuries of history, often more personal meaning, and in many cases more character. Here is what you need to know, including a story about two proposals, two rings, and why the stone you choose matters less than what it means.
Two Proposals. Two Rings. One Story.
This guide exists because of a decision I made on the Calvari Steps above Pollença Old Town, Mallorca.
I was living abroad with my partner. I knew I wanted to propose, the timing felt right, the place felt right. So I found a sapphire ring. Blue, because it's both our favourite colour, and because it matched the Mallorcan sky and sea. I proposed at the top of those steps with the old town spread out below us.
She said yes. The sapphire ring was always meant to be permanent, it still is, just not as an engagement ring. It was chosen for the right reasons, in the right place, at the right moment. The stone wasn't a diamond. It didn't need to be.
Back in London, I started working, quietly, without her knowing, on a second ring. I turned to Gemima, a local neighbour in Wandsworth Town, who I'd describe as exactly the kind of jeweller this site exists to help people find: experienced, unhurried, genuinely interested in getting it right. We worked together on a custom design, a lab-grown diamond as the centrepiece, a real diamond set on the inside of the band (so only she would know), and a small sapphire as a quiet nod to Pollença.
Six months after Mallorca, we went to Venice for a long weekend. I'd been carrying the ring since it was finished, waiting for the right moment. I proposed again, properly this time, with the ring I'd had made for her. She had no idea it was coming.
Venice, Photo: Matt Finch
Venice, Photo: Matt Finch
I'm telling this story because it illustrates something the ring-buying industry rarely acknowledges: there is no single correct way to do this. She now wears both rings, the sapphire from Pollença on one finger, the diamond from Venice on the engagement finger. They tell the whole story without a word being said.
The most personal ring isn't the most expensive one, or the most traditionally correct one. It's the one with the story behind it, the one she'll still be telling thirty years from now.
Is it acceptable to choose something other than a diamond?
Yes. Completely.
The expectation of a diamond engagement ring is largely a product of a De Beers marketing campaign from the 1940s, which successfully tied the diamond to the concept of enduring love. Before that, coloured stones were the norm, sapphires, rubies and emeralds featured in royal and aristocratic engagement rings for centuries.
Princess Diana's engagement ring was a sapphire. Now worn by the Princess of Wales, it is one of the most admired engagement rings in the world. The question of acceptability is the wrong question. The right question is: what suits her, and what means something?
Many of London's finest independent jewellers, particularly in Chelsea, Notting Hill, and Richmond, specialise in coloured stone work and bespoke commissions. Asking for something other than a diamond is not an unusual request. It's often the most interesting brief they receive.
The Main Alternatives
Sapphire
Hardness: 9/10 · Range: £500–£50,000+The most popular alternative to diamond. Sapphires are extraordinarily hard, 9 on the Mohs scale, second only to diamond, making them entirely suitable for daily wear. They come in a remarkable range of colours: the classic cornflower blue, deep navy, teal, padparadscha (a rare pink-orange), yellow, and colourless white.
Fine sapphires from Kashmir, Burma and Ceylon (Sri Lanka) can exceed diamond prices per carat. Commercial-quality blue sapphires, however, are significantly more affordable than equivalent diamonds, meaning your budget goes further.
Best for: someone who loves colour, has a favourite shade of blue, or wants something with genuine royal heritage and deep personal resonance. If there's a place, a sky, or a sea that means something to you both, a sapphire can carry that.
What to look for: even, saturated colour with no windowing (a pale, washed-out centre). Ask for heat treatment disclosure, most commercial sapphires are heat-treated to improve colour, which is widely accepted in the trade.
Ruby
Hardness: 9/10 · Range: £1,000–£100,000+Rubies are the rarest of the precious coloured stones, and the most expensive per carat. Like sapphires they are corundum (the same mineral family), so they share the hardness of 9. The finest rubies, deep, vivid "pigeon's blood" red from Burma, command prices that exceed top-quality diamonds.
Historically, rubies were considered more valuable than diamonds. That perception persists in the gemological world, if not always in the mass market.
Best for: someone with a bold, confident aesthetic who gravitates towards red or warm tones. A ruby solitaire on a yellow gold band is a classic, striking combination.
What to look for: vivid, saturated red without purple or orange undertones. Fine rubies are rarer than fine diamonds, budget accordingly, or consider a smaller stone in an exceptional setting.
Emerald
Hardness: 7.5–8/10 · Range: £500–£30,000+Emeralds almost always contain natural inclusions, known in the trade as "jardin" (French for garden). This is not a flaw; it is the nature of the stone. A completely flawless emerald would be extraordinarily rare. The rich green of a fine emerald is unlike anything else.
Emeralds are softer than sapphires and rubies and require slightly more care, they should not be subjected to hard knocks and should be cleaned gently. Most are oiled to improve clarity, which is widely accepted and should be disclosed.
Best for: someone drawn to deep green, with an appreciation for organic beauty over technical perfection. Emeralds suit vintage-inspired settings particularly well, halo designs, yellow gold, milgrain edges.
Moissanite
Hardness: 9.25/10 · Range: £300–£2,000Originally discovered in a meteorite crater, moissanite is now lab-produced and has become a serious engagement ring option. It is harder than sapphire and nearly as hard as diamond, with a higher refractive index, meaning it disperses light even more intensely, producing strong "fire" (rainbow flashes).
Moissanite costs a fraction of diamond: a 2ct stone might cost £600–£900 where a comparable diamond would be £10,000+. It is not a fake diamond; it is a different stone with its own distinct properties.
Best for: buyers who want the visual impact of a large, brilliant stone and are open about their choice. The fire of moissanite is genuinely beautiful, some find it more so than diamond.
Morganite
Hardness: 7.5–8/10 · Range: £200–£5,000A pale pink to peach-pink beryl (same family as emerald), morganite has grown enormously in popularity. Its soft, romantic colour pairs beautifully with rose gold, a combination that has become genuinely fashionable in London's independent jewellery studios.
Morganite is significantly more affordable than diamond or sapphire, meaning buyers can access large, impressive stones for modest budgets. A 2ct morganite in a rose gold setting can be found for under £1,500.
Best for: someone with a romantic, feminine aesthetic who loves pink or warm peachy tones. The rose gold and morganite pairing is a cohesive, considered look.
Using Stones Together, the Hidden Detail
One of the most quietly powerful things you can do with a bespoke commission is combine stones in a way that only the two of you understand. The ring I had made for Venice had a lab-grown diamond on the outside, the stone the world would see, and a small sapphire set on the inside of the band, visible only to her when she takes it off. A private nod to the Calvari Steps.
This kind of detail costs very little extra on a bespoke commission and means more than almost anything else. Gemima in Wandsworth Town, who made that ring, took the brief completely in her stride. It's not unusual for jewellers of that calibre. It's often the most rewarding work they do.
Other combinations worth considering:
- A birthstone set inside the band
- The stone from an inherited piece, reset into a new design
- A coloured stone accent alongside the main diamond, representing something specific
- Engraving a date, coordinate, or word inside the band alongside the stone
Where to Find Coloured Stone Specialists
Not every London jeweller works with coloured stones, many focus exclusively on diamonds. The independents in Chelsea, Notting Hill, and Richmond are generally the best starting point: broader stone sourcing, more willingness to engage with unconventional briefs, and the gemological expertise to select well.
The bespoke route suits coloured stone rings particularly well, few ready-made designs are built around a specific coloured stone, so commissioning gives you control over the setting, the metal, and the stone itself. For something as personal as a coloured stone chosen for a specific reason, it's usually the right path.